I just posted about Trek a week or so ago (here), so I wasn't planning on returning to this topic anytime soon, but then Rolling Stone just had to make a list ranking them all, and I just had to be checking my RSS feeds this morning to see it. So... Well, I mean, I really have no choice here. I hope you'll understand.

I'll let you go to the site to see how they rank everything and what they have to say. I largely agree. I haven't seen the latest movie that they include (Star Trek: Section 31) so I can't comment on that one, but I have seen all the rest. I thought I'd give my own ranking to the ones I have seen, plus a few thoughts.

#13: Star Trek: Nemesis

This movie was absolutely terrible. Everything about it was terrible. Data's death was pointless and badly done, none of the other characters are given anything to do, and even the normally amazing Patrick Steward seems to not know what to do or not to act in here. Shame this was the last TNG movie, because it was sooooo bad.

#12. Star Trek Into Darkness

This was just a terrible remake of Wrath of Khan. Remaking the second Trek film was a dumb idea anyway, but since this film took place in a new universe it kind of seemed like it might be interesting to see this universe's version of key Trek stories. But no... it was just terrible. Add to that story tweaks that just completely destroy Trek itself (or would, if they would ever be allowed to be mentioned again, which they won't), like the Khan blood thing. Just a terrible terrible film.

#11. Star Trek: Insurrection

As the Rolling Stone article says, there are a lot of fun character moments in this one. But overall, the story was simply boring. It would have been a so-so TV episode, but as a movie... To quote fantasy movie critic Jay Sherman, "it stinks!"

#10. Star Trek Beyond

A hair better than Insurrection. There is still too much action—a problem of all the Kelvin-verse Trek movies—but at the same time, there is a good villain this time and some nice character moments. Overall, meh, but not terrible.

#9. Stat Trek V: The Final Frontier

The Rolling Stone article places this one dead last, and I'd guess many Trek fans would probably agree, but I have mixed feelings on it. The film begins fantastically. In fact, the cold open is probably the best of any Trek film. Fight me. It is really really good. And how it fades into the the Trek fanfare and then the amazing Jerry Goldsmith theme that TNG borrowed for their series... that is a masterclass in how to open a movie. Unfortunately, that is as good as the movie gets and it's all downhill from there. There is a lot to dislike here. Spock's never before mentioned half-brother, making a joke of most of the characters, and so on. That said, there are also some very good character moments, and how can you not love a film that includes Shatner confronting a character he thinks is God and asking, "What does God need with a starship?"

#8. Star Trek: The Motion Picture

This is a deeply flawed film, but also with enough great moments that it is barely ahead of The Final Frontier. It has a similar problem of Insurrection in that they are trying to cram a TV episode story into a movie, even worse the TV episode story (which was written for a new Trek series) was a recycled plot from TOS, with barely enough material for even a TV show. They gave Roddenberry full creative control which they soon realized was a huge mistake and so they took it away from him for the rest of the movies. The movie takes it's almost nonexistent plot and marries it with an attempt at 2001-style visuals, which just doesn't work. Still, there are some really nice character moments and the idea of the movie bad guy, V'ger, really is creative, unique, and quite a good idea. Overall, not a great film, but a slight bit better than part V.

#7. Star Trek: Generations

Where to begin... As the Rolling Stone piece correctly says, we are given an interesting setup with Picard and Kirk meeting, but then both of them are written so completely out of character and every scene with the two of them is just so bad, that the opportunity is completely squandered. I mean seriously—why even bring Kirk into the movie if you are going to write him so badly, not even give him any interesting interactions with Picard, and give him nothing to do except die? That said, Shatner's acting in that final scene is pretty good, giving Kirk a stupid but also fairly well done scene. All that out of the way, there is enough to like here to boost it above The Motion Picture.

#6. Star Trek (2009)

Despite the problems here, this overall is a well done movie. The story is pretty good and gives us an great villain. The new cast is well-picked, especially the new Kirk. Though Pine deliberately doesn't try to do a Shatner impression, his performance still does seem to channel the energy of Shatner, making his Kirk at once very familiar, but also different enough to be interesting. There is far too much action here for a Trek movie, but the positives of the rest of the movie make up for it.

#5. Star Trek III: The Search for Spock

This movie gets more right than it gets wrong. There are some great character moments, and the overall story itself is pretty well done, despite the fact that the entire purpose of it is to bring Spock back to life. The villain is really well done; once you know he is played by Doc Brown, you can't unsee it, but even knowing that, he is still really good. The destruction of the Enterprise is equally well done. Later on in the series, blowing up the ship became so common that we just don't care anymore, but here even knowing it's coming, it is exciting and compelling. I also fully agree with Rolling Stone that Shatner's acting here when he finds out his son was killed is amazingly good, even if it was largely accidental (according to Shatner, it was entirely an accident that he missed his chair during the scene).

#4. Star Trek: First Contact

The best of the TNG movies. We are given a great plot here with the Borg, enough character moments to make any TNG fan happy, and great acting. Out of all the cast, Jonathan Frakes seems to be having a blast, and we can't help but feel the same way as we are carried along by the story.

#3. Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home

The great part about this one is the entire middle part—basically the entire time they are on Earth in the past—is like one big buddy film. Unlike Final Frontier which makes fun of the characters for its humor, this one puts the characters in funny scenes while keeping them entirely serious and without mocking them. It is so well done that you kind of wish it would go on longer, which is not something we often wish for in Trek moves.

#2. Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country

I think this film has a lot more flaws than Trekkies usually admit to, but it also does so much right that we can ignore all the faults. The story is ok, although nothing special, but what makes it work is the characters and the acting. Especially good is Christopher Plummer. He is so over-the-top that on paper you would say it's too much, but he makes it work and you find your eyes glued on him in every scene he's in. Reportedly, most of the Shakespeare he throws out was not scripted, but he kept adding it in and it worked so well that no one wanted to take it out. David Warner as an Abe Lincoln Klingon was also an idea that might have sounded bad on paper but worked surprisingly well. The ending battle here may not equal to the #1 film on my list, but it is close.

#1. Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan

No surprise here. This is just an all around great movie, Star Trek or not. Montalban as Khan is a fantastic villain and he matches against Kirk perfectly. I still get goosebumps when they first see each other after Khan has almost destroyed the Enterprise in a surprise attack. The directing is just that good, as is the acting. Speaking of that: the scene near the end where Spock dies still hits hard, even though I've seen it dozens of times and even though I know Spock comes back in the very next movie. This is all around an amazing movie and #1 in the series by a mile.

Here is that Rolling Stone link again → Every ‘Star Trek’ Movie, Ranked

So what do you think? Do you agree/disagree? What is your film order, form worse to best?

[note:

1. I borrowed all the images from the Rolling Stone story. But they screengrabbed them all from the movies, so I think there is no harm no foul here.
2. I didn't add Star Trek: Picard because it isn't a movie. But it also isn't a TV show. It kind of falls inbetweem. If I could add it, I would add the third season as #4.5 above. It is very very good, almost as good as First Contact. The other two seasons I would put near the bottom. They were ok, but also just ok.

]

Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed the post, please buy me a coffee.

David is an American teacher and translator lost in Japan, trying to capture the beauty of this country one photo at a time and searching for the perfect haiku. He blogs here and at laspina.org. Write him on Twitter or Mastodon.

Posted using CineTV