Mickey 17 (film): Such a massive disappointment

Whenever I find out that a sci-fi something or other is coming out with a huge budget and big names I get excited but with a tinge of trepidation. I feel as though this is a very tough genre to get correct and well, they didn't do a whole lot of getting it correct in this one.

It had a strong start but then the film just kind of faded into trash and there were a ton of plot holes, magical teleportation bullshit, as well as a complete change of heart by the rulers at just the right moment because the plot calls for it. This sort of lazy writing ruins films and it didn't help that one of the actors seems completely incapable of keeping his personal politics out of his roles.

This was supposed to be the next big things but unfortunately it is just a turd.

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So the story is that there is a crew on a massive spaceship that is going somewhere distant to colonize it and jobs are scarce. Mickey, having no education or skills and now being pursued by a mob boss on Earth over repayment of a loan, needs to get off the planet so he applies for a position as an "Expendable" which is a person who agrees to be "printed" over and over and suffer deaths that are temporary because his thoughts and memories are transferred to the new body and it all stats over.

Hence the name "Mickey 17" because he is the 17th version of himself and has died in many horrible ways leading up to this point as the humans conduct experiments on him in order to learn about their environments in this brave new world expedition of them.

Robert Pattinson is a fine actor in my book and I suppose he does a good job as "Mickey" but there is one thing that will annoy you the entire was through the film: his accent. What is that accent? I cant put my finger on it but it sounds like it is maybe Boston mixed with coward.

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He's a likable enough person in the movie, but that accent... I can't believe anyone greenlit that. It's so annoying and according to Robert himself he is mimicking the voice of Steve Buscemi from "Fargo." Steve sounds good with that voice and it kind of matches his odd look, Robert on the other hand? It is just unnatural and annoying.

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We arrive at this habitable planet and Mickey is the first person to encounter the "locals." The creatures don't seem to have any ill will towards the humans but yet, the humans still want to kill them all, seems about right. This is an interesting enough scenario, but it honestly takes far too long to get going. All the while we have to listen to Mickey's horrible accent in both his words and narration.

The leader of this expedition is played by Mark Ruffalo, who is someone on the planet that really hates Trump on a Robert DeNiro sort of level. While I am sure he would claim to the contrary, his character of Ken Marshall, who is an egotistical failed politician who speaks in a commandeering way and has tons of followers while being himself, and idiot.

There are a lot of people that feel that way about Trump and a lot of people that don't. No matter how you feel it is undeniable that doing this in a film is box office poison these days, and it was a really stupid move on the part of the film's makers to have this in there.

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Mark sternly denies that this is the case but the evidence is right there for all of us that suffered through this movie to see. He definitely is emulating Trump and the fact that many of his supporters (in the film) are wearing red hats all the time isn't a very difficult thing to figure out.

I hadn't heard about this before I started watching but it is pretty evident that there is some political messaging going on in there and one would thing that Hollywood would have learned by now that by alienating half of your potential audience is a terrible way to try to sell tickets.

I hate when politics enter my films because **enough with the propaganda messaging already!" but the main reason why I didn't like his character has nothing to do with real world politics. The main reason that I didn't like his character is because he lacks any substance: There is no reason why anyone in the ranks would ever allow him to be in charge. The guy knows nothing about what is going on around him, yet he is in charge of everyone in this very extensive, scientific, time consuming, and (in the fictional world) very expensive endeavor.

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_{Oh and there is a love story in there and of course it is interracial and the woman is a girl boss. Well done Hollywood! Didn't expect that at all}

The entire story is based around finding a way to get along with the natural inhabitants of the planet and Ruffalo's character wants to eradicate them even once it is determined that they are in no way a threat. That's the entire story and it is doesn't make any sense.

much of this film devolves into narrative chaos, bloat and excess.

That's from the AP, and I agree. The Mickey character's ability to continue to live over and over again via a printer is an interesting plot device, but they quickly step away from that and make it about a war between the humans and the bug looking natural inhabitants who haven't harmed the humans in any way since their arrival. It's stupid.

At the end of this I was glad it was over and I will admit that it took me two sittings to get through it all.

Should I watch it?

I can't think of any really good reason why you should. Science fiction is a tough one anyway and I am a die-hard Sci-fi fan to the point where I will allow much more flaw in a series or movie and still tough it out but I had a tough time getting through this. I will admit a lot of it has to do with Pattinson's stupid accent but mostly it is because the story is predictable and stupid. It has some reasonably funny moments but there isn't much tension built and honestly, the story is just kind of stupid. As is the case with a lot of attempts at blockbusters these days, the relied heavily on CGI to make this one happen at all and well, I'm sick of that sort of crap.

I suppose there is a very good reason why this was rushed to Video on Demand and is slated to lose around $100 million.

_{This film can be streamed for a fee on the big ones like Apple TV and Amazon, and basically any pay-to-watch sources out there.}